Dazed and Confused

This blog post will be very random, a cornucopia of current thoughts and a sensible conversation I’ve had with someone.

You know how it feels to be in cloud nine and then suddenly that cloud evaporates. You fall and of course you break and you don’t know how to start again from the scratch. I feel like in every phase of life we will be totally lost and filled with confusion specially while were getting older we will be encountering this situation more and more and that’s the reality. Take these scenarios as an example; after graduating from high school you ask yourself “Now what?” After graduating from college you ask yourself “Now what?” and so on… And I’m pretty sure that as you become older the question you’ll be asking yourself more often is “Now what?” and it’s the most difficult question to answer because you don’t know whether you  got the right or the wrong answer for it or if there’s right or wrong at all. I’ve tried watching tons of movies and reading books just to search for an answer. Frances Ha (2012), Reality Bites (1994), Get a Job (2016) just to name some of the films I’ve watched lately and yes I’ve related to some of the characters but then I wasn’t able to find the answer I’m looking for. Bewildered, perplexed and puzzled. I have come to realized that the broadness of life is composed of ups and downs, new beginnings and endings. It’s the same process that we go through and through. I know it’s quiet challenging but honestly it can also be tiring. The worst part is that it can also put you inside the bell jar and if you’re stuck in there… Oh well that’s a different thing if I blabber more about it I would have to write an entire book for it without a definite ending and thank goodness I was able to free myself from it (or should I say I’m still trying to free myself from it) And thinking too much about the future makes it more confusing that sometimes we’re not able to grasp of what is in the present because maybe we’re too scared or looking forward to things that’s uncertain. We all know that nothing is certain and again it’s another challenge for us and at the same time it makes us excited for what is about to come. I don’t know how to finish this paragraph properly. I don’t know how to end this and tell you something very optimistic. I guess I’m just writing this to make you (whoever is reading this) know and face the reality.

I remember a certain conversation I’ve had with someone. It goes like this,

Me: I just don’t know what will happen.

A: No one knows.

Me: Yeah. And that makes every person unsure of what to do in the present.

A: That’s why we should do our best in the present. And whatever the outcome is we should just accept it happily. Because we know that we’ve done our best and that’s the most important thing.

And here’s a snippet of script from the film Reality Bites (1994). A conversation between Leleina Pierce (Winona Ryder) and Michael Grates (Ben Stiller)

Leleina: Because it's like... do you ever have those moments in life… Where everything is okay? Do you know what I mean? Just for, like, one moment, everything is great. Not since I graduated, no. But yeah. When you, like, catch yourself in a moment... And you're saying, wait, I'm happy here in the moment. Right. And then it just goes away really quickly. Gone. It just... It's...

Michael: I know I've had a couple of those, you know. I always forget them, but I know I've had them.

Let me include in this post a montage of clips I took months ago. Background song is Lovers Carvings by Bibio.

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